.. I .. no ...

I know that usually this is suppose to be the post to broadcast the newly designed template of my blog. Sady, this isn't so.


Will explain later

What do you say before you close the book?

Perhaps this is only a writers thought (in my case, a wannabe writer), but when the story of that which is you is about to come to a close ... what do you say? If the curtain is about to close shut ... what do you do? What is contained in that last moment before the audience sees/hears/smells/feels that last experience of you?

Will it be one final number filled exuberance and emotion meant to keep the audience on the edge of their seat? Or is it an assisted closing of the curtain, implying all that is to be said was said .. and leaving the audience to come to terms of everything as they will?

Nevertheless .. it is a moment when the end is at hand; one final page to flip. And the book ends.

Perhaps I should write more ... because lets face it .. if you were an avid reader of this blog, then this book was the most vague piece of crap to be written. And is it because nothing was to be said? No, not at all. The mere fact is that all that was to be said .. wasn't spoken. There lied no dialogue to keep any reader interested .. instead there existed suspence sequence after suspence sequence with no sense of relief. One plot lead to another that lead to another, and no resolution was met.

And so .. as of this moment, especially since this blog came into existance as my gateway to relieve and make sense of my surroundings and overall my life; this blog will NOW be taken care of. And it will no longer be a tool to satisfy boredom.

With the likes of carefully constructed and maintained blogs such as Magmozine, Bill in Exhile, Best Gay Blogs and Joe.My.God (all of which are great inspirations), I will put more effort in actually saying something. And if as of this moment there is no time to post let alone learn the tools necessary to creating something great .. then DAMNIT, I WILL MAKE TIME!

THERE IS NO FINAL PAGE.

THERE IS NO FINAL CURTAIN.

There is only life .. and from here on in, I will grab life by the balls and make it what I want it to be.



Thank you,

Justin aka: Lone Wolf

Happy New Year

This video always reminds me that if your going to do something, might as well do it great.


And this ones just cute.

Much to post ... but lil time

And so for now .. pics will have to do

Time of Year prt 2

With my birthday here, and christmas around the corner, and new years next ... perhaps a vacation is in store.

Shadows everywhere

I've been plagued by dreams and feelings and ... hell even hallucinations (but fuck, that could be all me), everything telling me that ... where I'm at ISN'T where I should be.

Nothing makes sense now, and I feel that where I am now .... it never will.

What should I do?

Sunday

Thanks to a schedule change, I know have no days off this week. Oh well, pics like these keep me busy. AND, I know have weekends off, ... should be a first for a cook in the restaurant industry.

that time of year

Its that time of year ... December. And as per usual, I have mixed feelings about it. First off, my birthday is now 15 days away, and then Christmas, and then New Years .... I only have mixed feelings because everyone gets so sentimental this time of year; like a simple action is supposed to mean so much.

I really don't know if I even like christmas. My birthday ... that will be fun someday (if last year serves as a reminder). New Years ... is okay when you have people to spend it with, family is fun too.

Oh well, something shall happen .. something always does.

ON THE PLUS side, amidst this the usual shadows ... I get to find out what I really want (and necessarily can't pay for, lol).

Here are some hints.

A Cub with talent.

Well .. I attempted to post a link to a sexy cub who can sing and play guitar, and who also happens to be quite good at it. In fact, he's rendition of Hinder's "Lips of an Angel" is AWESOME.

Sadly, it did not work. But I did find another song he does. Hopefully this works.



YAY, It worked.

tried a song

apparently I can do this song at karaoke .... who knew?


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And you know what, this was the first song EVER that I attempted. It was in a karaoke booth, at the Luxor hotel in Las Vegas, and it was tapped. That tap is now in a land fill, in Vegas. It never left the hotel in my possession, lol.

Cleansing

Well, this posted ... lets see if I can fix and publish what I wanted to publish.

... MOVING ON ...

But, if I crack .. then I crack. Deal with it and move on.



ON TO OTHER ENTERTAINING ... er, um ... things.

Remember the days when Missy Misdemeanor Elliott was chubby? I do. And looking back at it now ... it really says much about her skill and presence as an artist when even a full figured woman can bust loose her skills and be successful. (of course, being friends with Sean Puffy Combs [aka, Puff Daddy, P Diddy, Diddy ... and whatever other names he'll utitize] doesn't hurt either)

Anyways, I remember those days. Back when pop was actually R&B, when you can cleary hear the difference between pop music, and rap, and hip-hop, and R&B; back when the genres weren't soo often used in mainstream that they can all literally mean the same thing.

And so .. to the point ... I found a song of her's. It brings be back to when I was a wee lad (remember, I am only 24).


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And why not .. some pics .... (and as per usual .. damn puter won't let me post some pics ... damnit. They'll be here soon ... I promise)

those days

Ever come across those days when I can't tell anyone anything? I'm there, right now. With everything of the new business (business partner, friends, people WANTING it open), and aspects of my work life right now .....

lets just say that I'm a pressured bottled. A bottle I KNOW will be opened very soon.

......... And I'm scared ..........

A good way to start the week

Fire And Rain - James Taylor (Dave Mathews Band Acoustic Version)

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(TAYLORS LYRICS)
Just yesterday morning they let me know you were gone
Susanne the plans they made put an end to you
I walked out this morning and I wrote down this song
I just can't remember who to send it to

I've seen fire and I've seen rain
I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end
I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend
But I always thought that I'd see you again

Won't you look down upon me, Jesus
You've got to help me make a stand
You've just got to see me through another day
My body's aching and my time is at hand
And I won't make it any other way

Oh, I've seen fire and I've seen rain
I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end
I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend
But I always thought that I'd see you again

Been walking my mind to an easy time my back turned towards the sun
Lord knows when the cold wind blows it'll turn your head around
Well, there's hours of time on the telephone line to talk about things
to come
Sweet dreams and flying machines in pieces on the ground

Oh, I've seen fire and I've seen rain
I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end
I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend
But I always thought that I'd see you, baby, one more time again, now

Thought I'd see you one more time again
There's just a few things coming my way this time around, now
Thought I'd see you, thought I'd see you fire and rain, now

THE LAST STRAW

And so ... lately I've been finding myself trying and trying to find ways to save the business partners ass. I'm done. I'm know in a point where I want to screw his ass (no ... not in that way [but hey, thats why I love my audience]).

Lets just say that when I'm locked out of my own house (that I SOLELY pay rent for), its the last straw. Given what I know of his business practices, he pissed off the last guy we ever wants to piss off.

HINT HINT! I used to work for a law firm. This should get really interesting.

**** WRITTEN DAYS AGO ****

And so ... lately I've been finding myself trying and trying to find ways to save the business partners ass. I'm done. I'm know in a point where I want to screw his ass (no ... not in that way [but hey, thats why I love my audience]).

Lets just say that when I'm locked out of my own house (that I SOLELY pay rent for), its the last straw. Given what I know of his business practices, he pissed off the last guy we ever wants to piss off.

HINT HINT! I used to work for a law firm. This should get really interesting.

L O S T ... and finding my way through it all

Even while standing on a mountain you must watch your step.

Ever come across those days when you totally lost .. but it doesn't matter; cause all you know is that you have to do everything you can to save your own behind? I never have ... not until now at least.

The business isn't going so well. Turns out the business partner is using me, and using so many others as well. I don't know why, but I figured out that he hasn't inputed any equity ..... nevermind. No specifics ... I learned that lesson already. Let's just say he wants me to fix his problems ... problems in regards to the business that he initiated. Apparently I'm the stilts he walks on to walk so high.

So I'm to help him, after my chief investor has backed out. What made her back out? Simple, it took one conversation ... one conversation with my business partner. And now .. we have people demanding $$$.

Needless to say ... I'm lost in it all .. but doing what I can to save my own ass. I'm only 24 yrs old ... I don't need this.

The Mountaintop

Just goes to show how much time I spend on the net these days, seeing as I haven't updated in a long time. And so .. here's the jist, about EVERYTHING.

Ever realise that the ground your standing on is actually a mountain? Suddenly you can see clearly where you stand; you can see clearly where your coming from; and for once you can see clearly the possibilities that lie ahead; you see all paths because your that far up. Your still as confused as you can ever be, but you know your just you.

Everything with the business is driving me nutts. Stress is at an all time high with time and resources at an all time low. Working full time and only have one or two days to get stuff done ... its really hard. Especially with a business partner who quit work completely to work full time on this project. MOVING ON ....

Work is work .. just like any other restaurant. Management cares for no one but themselves, and are completely dumbfounded as to why the restaurant (their's, not mine) is failing. But co-workers are great (most of them, minus most serving staff [they ain't the brightest bunch, but I guess thats what happens when your hired for your looks and not experience]).

Ran into an ex. Haven't seen him for awhile; and I was rather surprised to hear about a few things. But at the same, he's getting more of what he wanted than what he could from me (hello leather community, its me .. your admirer). And of course, I must mention that the current beau was mad at me, for 'leaving and forgetting' about him all the while I mingled a leather night at the Calgary Eagle.

To that, all I can say is this, "I'm sorry if my life doesn't revolve around you". Perhaps I'll say that in person one day. I just feel that if I'm going to go around and chat with people, play pool and all in all have a good time (not in that sense [and thats why I like my audience]), then .... well, still organising my thoughts on that one. Lets just say, that for someone whose attached to my hip, for someone I see everyday, for someone involved in everything I do ... I don't get how he can be upset when I don't see him for 30 minutes, one night, in a bar with all our friends around. I don't get it. At least he knows that I don't get it.

Like I said, I'm on a mountain ... I can see all around me. And I can still only take it all day by day.

AND NOW ... some pics. (apparently I can't upload pics on this ... that sucks ... lets try some tuneage)


... damn, that ain't workin either ... going to have to come back and update another day.

NEED HELP .....

... and no, I don't mean the business (with that, I could use alot [but I can do alone with my business partner, some help is alway appreciated though ;-) ]).

What I mean, is that my boyfriend (I ain't talkin much about this, don't wanna jinks it with all that happened with the last two) ....

ANYWAYS .. he made me a CD. And I, for the life of me, CANNOT figure out who sings it, or what its called.

PLEASE HELP ... (linked below)


Track02.cda
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