Word to the wise

Never blog immediately after getting home from the bar. Especially when drunk.

I'm BACK .. again

And so ... I'm back. After a long hiatus ... completely unplanned .. but such happens when life happens. For the avid reader, I apologise. For the random surfer, I apologise. But mostly for myself, I apologise. Ya see .. this blog is my venting tool. A place for me to be me and not worry about judgement from anyone. A place where I can shout in frustration or just be silly stupid. Either way .. this is my place. This is me. And I've neglected it lately. And so ... for everyone, (including he who is I) I apologise.

MOVING ON ....

Work is work. Overworked and underpaid for a restaurant that does not beleive in paying overtime. A place that pushes employees away with no gimmick of keeping them let alone attracting them. A restaurant that beleives big money and renovations will attract more customers and influence money flow (sadly they are wrong). Lets face it, a facelift rarely affects attitude. And there's SOO much attitude in this place. Makes me wonder .. why do I still work there? Whatever.

I'd like to say more ... but I won't at this time. For now .. here's some pics. All ya'll take care.


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TGIF ... again

Cat's Out of the Bag; And all is Out

SITUATION ! ! !

Okay ... as most of my avid readers know (if they're still reading), I have a tendency to vent. I'm okay with that .... judge me if you want cause I really don't care. This is my way of taking care of myself .. when I find myself in circumstances where I cannot talk to anyone ... this is what I do.

ANYWAYS ... here's the thing. I'm opening up a restaurant and bar. Thats right, I'm starting my own business with a good friend of mine here in Calgary, Alberta. Why? CAUSE WE NEED IT. ... ... ... plus ever since I was kid, I always wanted my own restaurant/bar. So .. the jist .. new gay bar here in Calgary, Alberta, Canada (just to see what that picks up for google [Free Marketing = YAY!])

When we first approached the idea of this new venture, we decided it was going to be hush hush. And thusfully, I kept up with my end of the bargain. All was quiet even though the stress was taking me to OVERLOAD (business aspects that I will not go into detail) and friends and all were asking me where I've been and why am I so tired. I needed to vent, but I kept quiet. For me, I will not speak until all is well.

But now, here I sit .. venting again to an anonymous audience (a pic will be posted one day, I promise) the frustrations that plague my mine.

BACK TO TOPIC; I was approached tonight. Someone I had known for the past year and a half, came up to me. He "heard" that I was opening up a bar. And in a drunken stupor decided to go on and on about why he's leaving his restaurant (gay owned and operated) and what he can do for another establishment within the community. TACKY can we say ... just a bit.

What gets me is that he's apart of the circle of friends that my business partner is close with. AND, I learned from my new guy that my business partner has been "talking". So much for hush hush ... apparently his word is fuck all (or I could just be angry at the moment).

What gets me, is that I was once in this scenario before; being approached by people I knew (not necessarily friends but more aquintances than anything else), and suddenly being given more attention than they would have ever given me. (I was rich once, and I lost it all) I know the drama and the unnecessary stresses it adds by people who want something just because of who they are and how they are "connected". By all means ... I should NOT have dealt with this, especially given the "hush hush" treatment by the business partner who continually tells me its all "hush hush", and who will also tell people who are friends of mine that its all "hush hush". Where's the fairness in that?

I honestly don't know what to make of this. I knew it was going to happen sooner or later ... but never should it happen when I'm in a competitors establishment and having a good time (a competitor known to discriminate [he's followed me around becuase I'm native] and since our place isn't open yet, and there's limited places to go in this city.) Is all this really necessary for me, for the one who kept up his end of the deal?

Bye Bye Writers Block

A fork in the road ... well I've reached many. And yet I stand there, pondering the best choice both for myself ... and that of other persons; for one thing I made a promise, a choice .... but the opposite would be my own mental health. When one choice is made, it takes a strain that no one can bare ... and yet I bare it; alone. And with the other choice, I hurt someone ... and still I bare that alone. And do these choices exist alone .... no they do not. They are only few of the many that exist at the moment. And every choice requires so much from me ... that there is no escape. Always a choice; and always a consequence. And with each choice and each consequence ... I hurt. I hurt no matter what.


I guess my writers block as come to an end.