Okay, once again I find myself surfing from blog to blog, reading the inner commentaries of numerous guys I've NEVER met; and will I ever met them? Right now, who knows. And as per usual I find myself admiring their life. On a logical level, and taking myself out of my own shoes, I find this to be sad. Sad on the basis that I merely wish to be them, or at least somewhat like them. I usually find myself wishing that I could do what they do (trips, b/f stories, work, etc etc), or feel what they feel. I always find myself thinking that their life is so much better than mine. And today, I've decided to find out why I think this way.
One commonality exists amongst all the bloggers I read that I wish to be; and thats simply that they are older. And I don't mean a few years years older than I (although, any true blogger would simply omit their age from their site, for in the end it really doesn't matter anyways), but from what I can tell from pictures and their comments and such, they are definately older than me, both in age and experience. I find this to be odd. For I hate it when guys call me a kid, I absolutely HATE it. Sure I am, that I cannot deny. However, the term kid or child implies some sense of immaturity or unwillingness to grow up. And once people know my age, they actually treat me differently. And let me tell you, how you treat a 30 year old is completely different than how you treat a 23 year old (I should know, I'm consistently mistaken as 30. But once they know I'm 23, its a completely different story). And they say I'm a kid?! Careful what you preach "boi's"!
Yes, I'm 23 years old. Yes, that is relatively young. But doesn't life dictate who old one is, not age? I've met many older men, most of whom proved that wisdom DOES NOT come with age. So, if many old men can be childish and kid-like, why can't a kid be considered mature and treated as such?
I say this because I've witnessed alot as a kid, been forced through alot when younger. And I don't hate life because of it. I don't feel that the world owes me anything (from time to time I do, but I know its me who must make the changes to get what I want and need). I know life is just life, it can be precious and it can be hell. But whatever the case me be, its my life; I live it. And thats why I hate being considered a kid. It implies that they (the judge) can live my life and somehow make it better. When called a child, they (thge judge) are looking down at me and making themselves, for themselves, better. When I'm called a kid, I'm disrespected and told that my life does not matter to them.
And don't get me wrong, I'm saying that my life should matter. Cause I know in reality that it doesn't, its my life and not theirs. But just knowing that it can; just knowing that they (the judge) want to know me .... well, if you want to understand and know and respect me, well then I want to understand, know and respect you. And just that fact that one wants too ... makes me respect them.
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1 comment:
First - I'm older than you (alot). However, I do remember being 23 and some treating me like a kid. I had a VERY good job (middle management) because I was a wiz kid of I.T., but nobody outside work believed me. I had nice things (car, clothes, apartment, etc.), but people thought I got them by hustling old men. I also know alot of older men who have the brain power of a 13 year old. Age doesn't dictate maturity, but people will always use it for intial judgement. But there is a bright side - you will eventually grow out of being young.
Jeff
Toledo, Ohio
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