Got Change?

Cause I could use some change right now. Somethings gotta give. Something better has got to come along.

I had dinner with the ex on tuesday. He almost cancelled due to work. However, luckily for me it worked out.

You see, I suffer from depression from time to time. Fortunately, nowadays, its mild; and far and few in between. However I was depressed for years awhile back .. pretty sad if you ask me, considering I'm only 24 yrs old. But nevertheless, I was. Depressed, alone .. nothing was working out and there was no way out of it. THANK GOD thats done.

But a small depression is lurking again. It's peeking its nasty head around corners, ready to pounce. I could feel its breath on the back of my neck its soo close. And all I want to do is sleep.

The dinner with the ex was nice. He's a crazy guy, and he's a good friend now too. He knows so much about me that no one else does; mainly because he asks and I never lie. I would never willingly disclose information about myself, for the most part simply because its shit that no one wants to hear, and in some cases that no one can hear. And therefore, I just developed a habit of not really telling anyone. So while we were going out, he would ask and I would tell. Thats how he got to know me.

Anyways, case in point ... he cheered me up, and asked me not to get depressed. I said I'd try.

I'm still trying.

I think I'm loosing.