As mentioned a few times before, I'm native. So not only am I different from society by being gay ... No no no, I'm not just a minority. I'm a minority within a minority living in society. Yes, I'm of different race AND gay. I'm native. And I love being Native. I love knowing the significance of the Eagle to my people. I love being apart of Sweats and Sundances and the drumming of the traditional drum. Thats me, thats who I am. I love being brown (even though I know I look like a white native person [fair skinned]).
Yet, why am I a victim? Demoralizing jokes that seem to only focus on native alcoholism directed toward me. Even those who don't know me, crack jokes about it, in an attempt to 'get on my goodside'. *rolls eyes* riiiiite.
BTW, Yes, I'm an alcoholic, I do drink. Sometimes I go overboard which i do feel bad about .... I DO NOT need a joke to feel good about it.
But, as a person, as an individual belonging to a group of people I allow it to slide. For its never meant to hurt, even though it does. Over and over and over again. And nowadays I can sense their curiousity as to why I don't hang with them.
A friend once cracked a "native + alcoholism" joke directed toward me and as per usual, I let it slide. However, what opened my eyes as to what was happening was that my roommate (my current) happened to be there too, and he was more disgusted and angry at the fact that a so-called friend would say such a thing than I was. I just figured "meh, he's dumb and an idiot."
And now I feel, the more "jokes" I endure not only at my expense but also at the exspense of my people, the more trust I lose in my friends which also turns up my guard on everyone else. So if I allow this to continue ... I lose. Once again, why I do allow this to happen?
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Interesting Tid-Bit
I Googled the world "demoralizing" for images, and the following was the 2nd pic that came up.
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